Christmas Bliss

This year was a pretty cool Christmas. Garrett was much more into the present opening than last year, but his attention was focused on that one present and didn't want to open anymore. He got lots of cool things, but most were just a little over his head and he doesn't quite understand the concept of them just yet. Among the favorites were a wooden Thomas train set, a kitchen set with play food, a power wheels 4-wheeler (courtesy of Uncle Dave), and so much more. He's also pretty excited about the snow shovel he got, but with all the rain, not much opportunity to use it. Here's some great pics capturing the essence of Christmas:

Merry Christmas!

The Nameless Girl

I don't think I'll EVER find a name for this baby girl. I've started the search over again (for the third time) in hopes that I'll find something that stands out. I was getting very frustrated so I gave up again, stopping at the letter G. I don't know what I'm going to do. There are a couple names that I kind of like, but nothing that screams "Here I am! I'm your daughter's name!" Nothing feels right! Ughh! I know that I still have PLENTY of time, but it seems to be going by so quickly that I'm worried that I'll be delivering her in no time flat and she still won't have a name! I know there are some people that are undecided on a name until they see their baby's face, but I'm not one of them. I would feel too pressured to pick a name right away, then maybe feel like I rushed it and have doubts-AFTER the name was written down!

So, of the names listed in the poll. Only one, well...two of them are mine. I can see that everyone likes Lillian, but I really don't (sorry to those who voted for it). So definitely Lillian, Gillian, Kendra, Jinny, and Helen are off the table. Those names just sound all wrong for our little girl. I like Ellis and Lucy, and I'm maybe still considering Evelyn. I know Doug still likes Evelyn, so I'm willing to keep considering it.

So I guess it's not too bad. I have 3 candidates. But finding a name that both Doug and I like is seemingly impossible. Too bad its not twins, only for the fact that I could name one and Doug could name the other...

...kidding!

If you feel like commenting and maybe giving me some more ideas, I'm all for it!

Playtime with Carolyn

Garrett loves his best friend Carolyn. She came over to our house Sunday 12/7 while her mommy was at work. The WHOLE time that they were awake together, Garrett was being a little show off. He would intentionally fall on the ground after spinning or dancing (which he doesn't normally do), constantly talk in her face to get her to pay attention to him, etc. I haven't seen him this bad before. And even though he loves music and always has, he kept requesting the music to be on while she was here. It was like he wanted to show off his latest dance moves in hopes of impressing her. Here's a little clip of it.

Christmas Party 12/6/08

Here's some pics from a recent family Christmas party.

Garrett "cleaning" inside the playhouse

This is pretty cute to me... Playing with a vanity while wearing a hard hat. You can't get much more masculine-sensitive than this.


Garrett playing with someone else's gift from Santa. We really need to get him one of these. He LOVES to help shovel outside.

Garrett is playing with cousin Owen, but Owen was a little sleepy. He climbed in the doll stroller and wouldn't get out. So Garrett was pushing him around in it, periodically checking to make sure he was okay.

All the kids together

Garrett getting his own gift from Santa

Mommy's little girl

This little girl has proven to be VERY active since the ultrasound. Mostly I feel her kicking while I'm eating or just after, or if I'm a few minutes into sitting down and relaxing. The funny part is that whenever I try to let Doug feel her kick, she stops. Without fail, every time. He gets a little mifted, but I just laugh. Finally the other night she was kicking away and without saying anything, I grabbed Doug's hand and put it on my belly. She still kicked for quite a while and Doug felt some pretty hard kicks. Doug thinks that she is going to like Mommy better than Daddy, just because of this latest preference issue. Garrett is doing much better at not always wanting Daddy, and he even lets me hug and kiss him and say "I love you" with some response. But I still think that all our kids are going to be "Daddy's". I'm the disciplinarian in the house, so I'll never be the first one they come too. Just as long as they show me they love me too, I'm okay with that.

Name Poll

For ANY of you out there that actually read this blog, I've set up a name poll on the right side of the blog. I'm about to have gone through my second book of baby names with no more ideas than after the first. Most of the names on on the poll are Doug's ideas (I don't really like any of them), but I thought maybe some extra opinions might make me look twice at them. As more people vote and shoot down the ones I really don't like, and as we come up with more names to consider, the poll will be changing. So PLEASE vote, and KEEP voting. Also, please keep in mind that the middle name is going to be Margery (or now possibly even Margaret, since Margery is a form a Margaret-we're unsure). Happy voting!

A Broken Heart

Today is a saddened day for me. Garrett broke my heart. I'm getting frustrated with the fact that when both Doug and I are around, Garrett chooses Doug for EVERYTHING! He NEVER wants me. Garrett was sitting on the couch with Doug this morning watching cartoons, and I was sitting on the floor next to them. I leaned over to kiss Garrett's hand and he screamed "NO!" and scrambled to get away from me. The worst part was the look he gave me... as if I was the big bad wolf.

I looked Garrett in the eyes for a few moments, trying to understand why he hates me so much, then got up and went into the kitchen and proceeded to ball my eyes out. I couldn't stop. Finally after 10-15 minutes I called my own Mommy. Unfortunately she know the feeling I'm talking about. I'm sure I've done the same thing to her unintentionally. But she knows how I feel. Amidst my tears she reminded me that Garrett is only 2, and he still does things without knowing quite why he does them. He doesn't have the emotional capacity to understand why what he did hurt me so much. She also reminded me not to take it personally. Although while she was telling me all this, I understood, I still had this ache in my chest. I told her it felt like he broke up with me. This was where the hysteric laughing started.

I'm still a little downhearted right now, but I know that he never meant to hurt my feelings. I'm so quick to cry at this point, that even Doug telling me that I'm a good mom today made me cry. Unfortunately, I also know that this will not be the last time that I've had my heart broken by my kids...

IT'S A GIRL!!!

So here's the money shot (I hope this is that last anyone ever sees of this!). As soon as Melanie (the ultrasound tech) put her little wand on my belly looking for it, I knew. I said, "Is that what I think it is?" She asked what I thought it was. Well, I've been around enough preggers to know that 3 white lines indicates a girl. And I was right! Here's the proof that I'm having a girl!

Here's a good 3D pic of her sweet little face.

A little hand...

And a fairly large looking foot!

A great profile shot! Your can see her heart and spine. And her little lips are parted!

Apparently she likes to lay with her legs curled up just like mommy.

Again with the open mouth. She might be a little chatterbox like her brother.

Another great 3D pic. She's a little pressed up against the placenta, and both arms are up by her head, but the nose and lips look perfect!

Yawn...

So apparently everyone thinks that because I was hoping for a boy that I didn't want a girl. NOT TRUE! I am thrilled to be having a girl! But before I found it was a girl, I really was liking the idea of having another boy. I hope that it didn't come across that way, that I would be disappointed to be having a girl. Regardless, it's a girl and I'm HAPPY! Now, the only problem is finding a name we like... And so the search continues.

The Eternal Name

So, next week Wednesday is my 20 week ultrasound... and the day we find out if it's a boy or a girl. I recently wrote that I really wanted a boy and got very defensive for all the people I KNEW were thinking that I was a horrible person for wanting one sex over the other. But now I find myself wanting a girl, too (though I'm still sure it's a boy).

Mostly I feel very sad for the reason I want a girl. Doug's Grandma DeGraaf has Alzheimer's, and has very recently rapidly declined. I've always known her to be blissfully unaware, but HAPPY. Now, she's crying a lot and emotionally very unstable. Doug's grandpa promised her at the beginning of all this that he would never put her in a nursing home. But he can't take care of an 80 year old woman by himself. And so the decision was made that it was the best thing for her to be taken care of by others in a nursing home.

Doug is taking this pretty hard. ALL of his grandparents are still alive. And I know it's going to be hard on him when she passes. When he told me the news of his grandma, he agreed to the name I was considering for a girl, as long as her middle name was Marjorie (his grandma's first name-debate is still going about spelling).

Even though she's not my grandma... even if we never use the first name I was considering... even though I would never have otherwise chosen the middle name to be Marjorie , it feels RIGHT. And if Grandma doesn't make it to see this little child, I hope that there is always this familiar spark in him/her that makes us stop and smile for reasons we can't begin to understand.

Roller coaster of hormones...

I know its typical to cry at the drop of a hat when you're pregnant. I cried watching the movie Elf in the middle of summer when I was pregnant with Garrett. But lately it feels like so much more. I feel lonely, huge, and dumb. Before everyone gets too confused, let me explain.

Doug and I aren't connected lately. He's busy, I'm busy, and then I'm tired. I'm growing at a faster rate then I did with Garrett. In no time flat I was in maternity clothes, after I lost 10 pounds before pregnancy. Believe me, those compliments aren't there anymore, and if they are, they're falling on deaf ears because I just don't believe them. I'm too huge! And not only am I forgetting things, names, and confusing my son with my cat, I feel like I cannot contribute intellectually in a conversation. I read other's blogs, and the content in them is absolutely amazing. The thought processes are crystal clear and the points being made are points worth taking.

I just don't feel like me. I don't want anyone to think "boo-hoo for Krysia", because this is not a pity party. Just someone please tell me that I am COMPLETELY hormonal and that its all in my head. That way I have some hope for post-pregnancy...

Happy Halloween!

Garrett the ferocious penguin ("Boo!")

Garrett and I pausing to pose for a quick pic while Trick-Or-Treating

Going to get more "nanny" (candy)

We didn't go far on our adventure for candy, just around the cul-de-sac to our neighbors. Believe me, even the 5 pieces of candy he did get is too much for my candy-sensitive boy!

Pumpkin Carving

On Sunday, Doug and I decided to carve our pumpkins to get ready for Halloween. Garrett wanted to help, but since he's too young to wield a knife responsibly, we put him in his highchair to color while we worked. As you can see, not only did he get the marker on the paper, but on the tray as well. Then, Garrett starts saying, "Hair, hair." And I look up and he has the marker on his head.

Yup, he colored his hair. Sorry Nana.

After we got his pumpkin carved, he really enjoyed playing with the top, taking it on and off. HIS "putt-in" (pumpkin) was his favorite.

Big cheesy smile!

Daddy carving his pumpkin...

"Off!"

Smells good, huh?

Daddy's pumpkin...

Mommy and Daddy's pumpkins...

Mommy, Daddy, and Garrett's pumpkins...

Mommy, Daddy, Garrett, and Baby's pumpkins!

Boo!

Fun Fall Day

Thursday afternoon, after Garrett's nap, we decided to have some fun time outside before Doug came home from school. It wasn't TOO cold out, but Garrett wanted to wear his hat at mittens too.

Of course the lawnmower had to be played with. We walked up and down the sidewalk for about 10-15 minutes, then went around the cul-de-sac. We ended up mowing the neighbor's lawn.

After playing with the lawnmower, we played in the leaves that were piling up along the curb. I made a pile in the grass and he laid in it. Looks so peaceful, huh?

After Doug got home we went to Post Family Farms to get some pumpkins. There was this kitten that fell in love with Garrett and vice-versa. Here's Garrett giving the kitten a hug.

And pointing out that kitty has a tail...

This cat was cool. It kept sitting on the pumpkins and posing by them. Too bad it wasn't my cat I was taking pics of!

Garrett and the pumpkins...

Here's a cute (but wild) video of him running through the leaves on the curb. He thought it was so fun to kick the leaves all over!

Remember the obsession with the vacuum?

Here's the updated version. The lawnmower.

Too stinkin' cute!

Are we or aren't we?

That seems to be the question of late.



"Are you going to find out the sex of the baby?"



Well, I would like to. Last time, I actually was content to wait, like Doug wanted. Although I did want to know, I thought it would be a fun surprise. So we waited... and waited and waited. Now, I find that I'm actually hoping for one sex over the other. And for all you booing me at the moment, you know that when you say "all I want is a healthy baby", although it's ALWAYS true, that's never the answer to the question.



That being said, I would love for Garrett to have a little brother. Of course I would love a little girl too. But there's something about knowing Garrett might have a best bud and constant playmate that makes me melty inside. I never had a sister, and my brother never had a brother. My ideal family is NOT one boy and one girl. Since my relationship with my brother is virtually nonexistant, I feel like I'm missing out on a lot. I also hope that if this baby is a girl, that she and Garrett will be close, like David and I once was.

I think that because of this, I want to know. That way I can try to be as prepared as possible for whatever may come.

We have teeth!

So FINALLY after 6-7 months of getting no teeth, we have 4 more! The last weekend in July before we shipped Garrett off to Muskegon for the weekend, I saw something shiny and white catch my eye in his mouth. I stuck my finger in there and there they were! He finally got his 4th lower front tooth and a lower molar popped through too! Then just last week, again, something white and shiny caught my eye while he was laying on his back laughing. Two upper molars! We're finally on our way to discovering more foods, but unfortunately he's asserting his independence and refuses EVERYTHING! All in good time, I guess...

My little dancin' fool!

Okay, so this video is about a month old, but I couldn't resist putting it up anyway. I just love it when he dances!

A day at the park...

Yesterday, EB and I decided to get the kids together to play at the park, since they don't get to see each other that often anymore. We initially tried to go to Hager Park, but the Discovery Center (the only structure suitable for toddlers) was closed for annual maintenance. So I mentioned a couple more nearby parks, and we decided to go to Rush Creek Park, the park where Doug plays softball every summer. They had a blast! This picture was kind of sentimental for me because the last time he was in this exact swing, was on our 4 year anniversary and he was only nine months old! Check out the old pic at garrettdegraaf.blogspot.com February 2008 postings... I can't believe how much bigger he is!

Here's Garrett and Carolyn enjoying the double slide. They can both go down all by themselves!

Sharing leaves...

Carolyn was so excited to help Garrett blow bubbles. I love the face that she's making too!

It almost looks like Garrett's going to eat them!

A little blurry, but by far my favorite picture!

All boy!

The big boy slide

Exploring a tree

It was such a great day at the park. EB and I were commenting on how cool the day was and it felt like Fall was about to show itself. The smell of the air and the laughter all over made it a very special day. I was very grateful to have a special morning for Garrett to enjoy!